i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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