We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
