thus making me awesome and them whores
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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