Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
