Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there. http://tfl.nu/qu8f
  Replies (15) Good night (666) Bad night (5068)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago http://tfl.nu/ks9q
  Replies (22) Good night (840) Bad night (3639)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever. http://tfl.nu/sfg3
  Replies (31) Good night (1475) Bad night (4293)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night. http://tfl.nu/2nh3
  Replies (20) Good night (4443) Bad night (2170)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?

  (914): View more from New York

  you mean faeutihaers?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night? (914): you mean faeutihaers? http://tfl.nu/mcba
  Replies (34) Good night (10917) Bad night (1432)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  it happened again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels? (973): it happened again. http://tfl.nu/jmjg
  Replies (8) Good night (6261) Bad night (1015)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone.. http://tfl.nu/l9l0
  Replies (10) Good night (1146) Bad night (3539)
• Favorite

  (+32): View more from Belgium

  this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+32): this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk http://tfl.nu/muj2
  Replies (8) Good night (3158) Bad night (1071)
• Favorite

  (940): View more from Texas

  going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (940): going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?" http://tfl.nu/r9ic
  Replies (21) Good night (3823) Bad night (1648)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU. http://tfl.nu/rhle
  Replies (16) Good night (5588) Bad night (1315)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"

  (1-616): View more from Michigan

  I think you were raised by the wrong sister

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks" (1-616): I think you were raised by the wrong sister http://tfl.nu/18dn
  Replies (1) Good night (1630) Bad night (416)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks." http://tfl.nu/iwi5
  Replies (6) Good night (1259) Bad night (373)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis? http://tfl.nu/jflh
  Replies (1) Good night (525) Bad night (315)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful http://tfl.nu/eznx
  Replies (1) Good night (571) Bad night (392)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties. http://tfl.nu/9kne
  Replies (2) Good night (689) Bad night (1087)

Randomize