Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf

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(847): View more from Illinois

everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.

(224): View more from Illinois

it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.

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(913): View more from Kansas

ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(515): View more from Iowa

You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.

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(404): View more from Georgia

I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.

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(865): View more from Tennessee

to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.

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(925): View more from California

She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.

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