this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
