Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
