OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
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Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
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if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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