Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
