i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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