When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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