she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
