After last night, I could never be a politician.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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