oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
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