Pants 0. Shit 1.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize