Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
What a fucking waste of an outfit
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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