Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
