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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.

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• (315): View more from New York

  can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day

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  25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous

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• (949): View more from California

  I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...

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• (641): View more from Iowa

  you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you

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• (842): View more from

  we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone

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• (561): View more from Florida

  am i new drunk or am i still drunk

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.

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• (516): View more from New York

  I spy something regrettable...

  (716): View more from New York

  Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.

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