Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
