I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I am in a vortex of obligation.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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