then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize