this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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