Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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