I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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