I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
