That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
