Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.