I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize