so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
