Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
4 words: hood of his car
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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