love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
