i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
