plz talk dirty to me
nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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