We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I party with great urgency now.
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