i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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