so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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