Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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