I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Randomize
