Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Randomize
