He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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