No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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