Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
