please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
