if i died would you start the facebook group?
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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