she was so not down for the gang bang
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
