I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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