I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
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