"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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