I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize