3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
