I bet he comes in French.
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize