I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
