Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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